13 Practical Ways to Forge New Biblical Friendships

Friends. Who needs them? We do! Life in a fallen world is hard. There is no question that we will face rough times – the loss of a job, a necessary surgery, struggles with a teen child, separation or divorce, gaining child custody over neglect and the death of a family member. We need friends…

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Deborah Haddix

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Friends. Who needs them?

We do!

Life in a fallen world is hard. There is no question that we will face rough times – the loss of a job, a necessary surgery, struggles with a teen child, separation or divorce, gaining child custody over neglect and the death of a family member.

We need friends and attorneys help with a divorce claims who will listen as our emotions burst forth, help us hold ourselves together, and stand with us over the long haul. You can also find a law office near you if you feel you need help going through a divorce.

However, establishing biblical friendships is not an easy task. Have you ever considered that we sign a contract for marriage and a birth certificate when our children are born? We even sign a license to drive a car, a mortgage to own a house, and an agreement to join a gym. But there is no document to bind us to a friendship. No signature required. Not even a seal or stamp of commitment. You can browse around here to learn more.

Our only guidebook is the Bible.

13 Ways to Forge New Friendships

1. Be Alert

We all have our own ideas about where we will meet new friends or what they will look like. But the truth is that we never know when God may be orchestrating a new and deep friendship for us. If we are not alert, we may miss the beautiful one He has placed right before our eyes. Let this truth permeate your every first meeting. Be watchful!

2. Get Involved

New friendships cannot be forged as you hunker down inside your home. Look for ways to get involved with others – community, church, your child’s school, special interest clubs, Bible studies, MOPs.

3. Take a Risk

God is communal. He chooses to put women in our lives to encourage us and challenge us. If we are not willing to take a risk in reaching out, we may miss out on a sweet friendship He had planned for us.

4. Initiate

Never stop saying, “Hello!”

Don’t wait for others to make the first move. If you see someone you would like to know, approach her and begin a conversation. Let her know in a nonaggressive, nonthreatening way that you are interested in being friends.

5. Reach Out to the Lonely

Be on the lookout for those who are sitting alone. Whether she is a new face in the room, shy, or even a bit awkward, reach out. You may receive the beautiful gift of friendship by demonstrating that you care.

6. Smile

… a lot! Who doesn’t enjoy being around someone whose face reflects joy and happiness?

7. Speak Life (Ephesians 4:29)

Encouragement and affirmation are good for the soul. Develop a habit of sincerely making others feel important. Look for something you admire about their character. Then say it with enthusiasm!

There are two kinds of friend in this world. You are one or the other. Either you are the friend whose entrance into a room screams, “Here I am!” or the friend whose entrance shouts, “There you are!” Share on X

8. Remember, Not Everyone Will Like You

None of enjoys rejection. It just doesn’t feel good. Yet, we must realize that sometimes when we reach out, when we take that risk, our offer of friendship will be declined. Understand that it will happen, and it is okay.

9. Be Selective (Proverbs 18:24)

Choose your friends wisely. Not everyone can be an intimate friend. Consider what you want your friendships to look like and whether someone exhibits the traits of a biblical friend.

10. Do Not Impose Age Limits (Titus 2:3-5)

Intergenerational friendships are a wonderful gift. Without them we miss out on something quite special.

Of course, we need friends our similar age and in our same season of life. With them we can share our daily ups and downs. They understand for they are there too. But friends of another generational era can provide perspective and experience from a different season than our own. Their input is a blessed asset.

11. Be Patient

Give friendships time to grow. When we expect too much too soon or share too much too soon, we can scare away potential friends. Allow for some “getting to know you” time. Don’t rush the process.

12. Invite God into Your Friendships

Our friendships will not develop into much if they are based on our human efforts alone. Each of us is broken and flawed. We live in a fallen world. It is possible that we might be able to keep up these healthy friendship traits for a while on our own, but eventually we are sure to disappoint.

13. Trust God

Trust that God has a good and perfect plan for you regarding friendship. After all, this relationship is His idea. It’s His design.

He will provide, but His provision may not come according to our plan or timing. That friend you long for may be praying for you right now, asking that God would bring a new friend into her life. Don’t lose hope. Trust that God will do a beautiful work in your life by supplying just the right person, or people, in His perfect timing.


Biblical Friendship

A 4-part video series exploring friendship from a biblical perspective. Sessions include: A Longing to Belong, The Circles of Friendship, Friendship Traits and Threats, and Forging and Maintaining Existing Friendships. Each brief session is followed by prompts for a time of self-reflection.

In addition to the 4 videos, this package includes a bonus video (13 Ways to Maintain Existing Friendships), worksheets for sessions 2 and 3, and 2 bonus PDFs.

Available through Gumroad – $14.99

Comments

10 comments

  • Deborah, love this! So many great tips and scripture to support it. Thanks for sharing on one of my favorite topics!

  • So many wise thoughts here! I’ve been the one who’s afraid to reach out to another because of fear of rejection. But, when I’ve done so with the mindset of trying to be an encouragement and getting outside my own head, God’s often blessed those efforts.

  • Great advice and I’m looking forward to putting them to use now that I’m vaccinated and things are opening up again!

  • Love these practices for building strong friendships. Seems like it is harder than ever to make new friends.

  • As one who likes being a homebody, I appreciate the encouragement to reach out to others. I especially like the point about having friends of all ages, not restricting ourselves to our own age group.

  • Amy Johnson

    I have been praying for Christian friends, so this post is very timely for you. Where I live, everyone hangs out with their family so they really aren’t interested in making friends. It was so much easier when I had little kids because you could gab with other moms in the nursery, or schedule play dates. I like that you included the Titus verse because I always feel younger women want nothing to do with older women. Thanks for all these tips. I will definitely put them into practice. Visiting from Grace & Truth link up.

  • Thank you for this blessed lesson about practical ways to form Biblical friendships. I treasure my friends in Christ. Blessings.

  • Joanne Viola

    We surely need friends to journey this life. All of these are good reminders and guidelines for friendship. Friendship is a gift and one that I treasure deeply.

  • Such sound practical advice – good friendships are precious and so worth the time they take to develop and maintain – thank you for these reminders.

  • Thank you for this excellent practical advice on making new friends. Enjoying this for myself and sharing so others can be blessed too!

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About the Author

Deborah Haddix

I am a child of God, wife, mom, grandma, daughter, sister, niece, and friend who loves nothing better than spending time with those I love.

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